When Your Child Is Being Tested for Cancer

Two weeks ago I shared at Woman to Woman Ministries about some struggles I was facing. One of those struggles was waiting on a major medical test result for my 14 year old daughter. One that had me crippled with fear.

My daughter has a bone condition that causes tumors all over her body. She currently has more than 100 tumors on her body. 99.9% of these types of tumors are benign -not cancerous. Our doctor has taught us the things to look for and she goes in for regular checkups every 6 months. These tumors do cause pain. It is likened to arthritis in that if she does too much, she can hurt. If she does too little, she can hurt. And sometimes, she hurts for no reason at all. But my brave young lady rarely complains.

When we went to her checkup last month, Grace wanted to talk to the doctor about one of her spots herself. Normally she tells him she is fine and lets me do any talking. This time, she wanted to handle it. Her knee has been hurting her quite a bit lately. And the tumor has gotten very large. These are two of the things we are to look for: rapid growth and severe pain. These two mixed together can be a sign that one of the tumors is cancerous. Doctor xrayed her knee and compared it to the previous xray from a few years ago. It was found that yes, it had grown significantly.

Because of the size and pain, it would be ideal to remove the tumor and biopsy it. However, the tumor is dangerously close to a very important muscle in her leg. We had this surgery scheduled before and once the dangers were explained, we felt it was best to not proceed with the surgery. Knowing how we felt about the surgery, this time the doctor decided to do a detailed MRI of this knee.

The last time my daughter had an MRI, she was only an infant, so they put her to sleep. This time she would be awake. We looked up videos on YouTube so she could see and hear what an MRI machine sounds like,  those massive things can be scary for even an adult. She bravely went to her MRI and for 3 hours had a scan of her knee and her spine -they wanted to check for tumors inside her spinal cord as well.

Now we wait for results.

Every single time I went to pray for my daughter in the time leading up to the MRI and the time waiting for the results afterward, the words would get lodged in my throat. I couldn't do it. I couldn't pray. I became panicked. They were checking my child for cancer. Cancer.

The fear would sink in and cause me to lose my breath. I didn't know what to do or say or think. I knew God knew the situation and knew my heart. But I deeply wanted to pray the words aloud pleading for my child's health and life. Yet, I just couldn't. I am so thankful for family, church family, friends and my sisters in Christ who prayed on our behalf.

In this time of waiting, I attended a women's retreat with the ladies from church. While at the retreat, we sang a song that had me running the the altar.

I'm no longer a slave to fear

I am a child of God

I'm no longer a slave to fear

I am a child of God

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You split the sea so I could walk right through it

My fears are drowned in perfect love

You rescued me and I will stand and sing

I am a child of God

I don't have to be a slave to that fear. I don't have to be crippled by it. God split the sea so I could walk right through it and then He crashed the waters down to drown my fear! I am His child. My daughter is His child. He loves her as much as I do, even more so. Finally, standing at the altar, tears streaming down my face, I was able to pray the words. Asking God to let the report be good. Asking Him to heal her body.

We still didn't have an answer. The tumors were still on her body. But I knew we didn't have to fear anymore.

A week went by. No answer. I finally called and then waited on the doctor to return my call. Then the phone rang. My heart started to race as I saw the number flash across my phone. Immediately the words of the song came back to calm my heart. God drown these fears. I would not let them come back. Our sweet nurse, Angie, told me the two words I begged God for, "no cancer."

I think I said PRAISE GOD about 1000 times that day. I am still praising Him.

Yet, I still know that our answer doesn't always come back the way we want. Sometimes God doesn't answer how we think He should. Far too many people do get results of cancer living inside them. Far too many parents hear the words that their child does in fact have cancer. Far too many people still struggle with finances, health, and relationship troubles. Far too many people still face fears. But the truth is still the same: God drown our fears because we are His children. No matter what results you are waiting on, no matter what circumstance is not going as you want, remember, you are His.

You don't have to be a slave to fear, to health problems, to relationship problems, to financial problems, to any problems. Lean on God. Let Him take the fear away and live fully for Him, even in the midst of trials.

Come back tomorrow as I share more on Grace's results. To read more about Grace's story, click HERE and HERE.